As the parent of an older teen on the verge of adulthood, you are a very important coach. You can’t force feed them, but you can motivate, encourage, challenge, and advise. And while you can help them articulate what they believe, challenge their thinking, remind them of the “basics” already learned during earlier years, the time has come for your child to truly own his or her own beliefs and choices.
Here are some ways you can provide a listening ear as they wrestle with and possibly question the values they learned as a child while maintaining a strong relationship that includes frequent, open dialogue.

• Give perspective concerning big questions. During the transition into adulthood, your son or daughter will face big questions including: Where should I go to college? What kind of work should I do? Where should I live? What should I do with my life? Who should I marry? Direct your child back to overarching biblical principles. The last words of King David to his son Solomon (in 1 Chronicles 28:9) provide a model for parents advising emerging adults: “And you, my son Solomon, acknowledge the God of your father, and serve him with wholehearted devotion and with a willing mind.” Amid the practical advice parents may offer on setting goals, choosing a job, finding a spouse, and so forth, we must also elevate the importance of making decisions in light of the scriptures.
• Give a vision for marriage and family. Parents often go to extremes to help a child prepare for college or the workforce but don’t know exactly what they can do when it comes to preparing them for the more important work of marriage and family. 

While a small minority will be called to life-long celibate service, most young people are called to marriage and family (Genesis 2:18-24). We sometimes overlook how much marriage and family serve as the organizing structure of life and the prime arena for our spiritual development. You have a vital part to play in helping your child leave your nest and cling to their future spouse.

• Make the most of the time. While leaving home is a healthy and good process, it can be emotional for parent and child alike. Ease the pain by using the remaining time your son or daughter has at home to create lasting memories. Spend quality time together connecting and talking about the exciting adventure of adulthood.
•                       Here are three final ways you can give your child the best opportunity to succeed and make an easy transition:
  • Choose a particular book or resource to go through together. Schedule coffee dates to talk through specific topics.
  • Plan a special time together to discuss the Before You Leave resource (provided below). Use the conversation to identify areas that might require some coaching before they leave.
  • Amid the last-minute packing and tearful goodbyes that accompany launching your young adult from the nest, stop to spend a few minutes writing him or her a letter of blessing to encourage your child. Let them know that you are praying for them during this season of transition.